You know when you send a text on your phone, and you can insert a "Canned Message"? The ones on my phone are things like "Running late - see you in 15", "Can't talk now - in a meeting", "Love you too!" or "Where are you?"
These canned messages are, supposedly, things that you would say (text) so often that it would just be easier to go into the canned message folder and select the appropriate response.
I have noticed lately that real-life conversations have similar habits as canned messages on your phone. The ultimate example is the typical meet-you-on-the-street conversation:
"Hi Sally!"
"Hi Maria! How are you?"
"Good, thanks! How about you?"
"Oh good! And how are you?" (I love when this happens - when you forget that you already asked the person how they are, and you ask again...hahahaha....)
To buck the trend here, I always say "FABULOUS!!!" when someone asks me how I am. Even if I'm far from fabulous, I still say it. Many people are taken aback and say "Fabulous?" and give me a funny look. Some people say "Oh, I wish I was fabulous".... here is where I roll my eyes and think to myself...you CAN be fabulous, you just have to stop thinking of yourself as drab, boring and annoying.... Even though I think they are drab, boring and annoying....
The majority of canned conversations I've encountered recently have to do with babies, since I have a 15-month old boy.
It started when he was a baby:
"Is he a good baby?" (As if babies could be bad??!!)
"Is he sleeping through the night?" (Um, no, he's a baby and needs to nurse during the night)
Then, progressed once he got older:
"Oh, he's crawling now? HAH BA HA HEEEE, I bet you're one busy mom now!!" (As if I didn't expect it??)
"I bet he's just getting into everything!" (Yes, babies are supposed to be curious, and I like it when he 'gets into' things)
And once he started walking? Oh my, can you just imagine all the smug "HOOoooh boy, I bet you never stop running now!!" comments?
Seriously people. Get original. I'm sick of hearing the exact same conversations wherever I go. Break out from the mold and be fabulous once in a while!!
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Hold Me
I went out for supper with my sisters the other night. We were jabbering and I was telling a story about something I recently experienced. I was barely even started into the story before they both enthusiastically exclaimed "BLOG POST!"
I guess they were right - it would be a good blog post. At least this way I can get through my story without a sister spitting nacho chips and artichoke dip across the table at me.
So, here it is. A blog post about telemarketers. But not the typical "telemarketers are so stupid" complaint. Because when the subject of telemarketers comes up, no matter where you are, the dialogue and things people say are always the same. They brag about how they like to challenge the poor employee to an intellectual battle, or leave the phone off the hook and walk away, or ask the employee if they could call their house at suppertime. And then they giggle and chortle at their original cleverness.
No. This is different.
The phone rings. I look at the number. I don't recognize it, but we get overseas calls from family so I answer anyway.
Here is the conversation:
Hallo!
*silence*
Hello? (Patiently - because sometimes overseas calls take a bit to connect)
*silence*
Hallooooooooo....? (Getting slightly perterbed)
*computer recording, cheerfully* Hello! This is a VERY important call. Please hold while we connect you to one of our representitives. *cue Celine Dion music*
Ok. Did you catch that?
They called ME, and then put ME on hold! They didn't even say who they were!
Then I got thinking...what kind of people think this tactic will work? Who thought up this genius idea? I almost want to wait the awful music out to see what the company is. But on the other hand I don't want to validate them by waiting. I just do. not. understand. how anyone could ever think that this was a good idea! .
I imagine this - they are a bunch of brush-cut professionals in suits and ties, sitting around a mahogany committee table. Oooh, the mahogany makes me think that they are all smoking pipes and talking in a British accent. Maybe they even have their hands over the side of their overstuffed chaires, petting a loyal foxhound. And scratch the ties - they are wearing tweed suits with bowties! Brilliant! I bet the company wants to know our opinion on fox hunting in the 21st century. Maybe when I get these calls, I can just say "Tally Ho!" and they'll leave me alone?
I guess they were right - it would be a good blog post. At least this way I can get through my story without a sister spitting nacho chips and artichoke dip across the table at me.
So, here it is. A blog post about telemarketers. But not the typical "telemarketers are so stupid" complaint. Because when the subject of telemarketers comes up, no matter where you are, the dialogue and things people say are always the same. They brag about how they like to challenge the poor employee to an intellectual battle, or leave the phone off the hook and walk away, or ask the employee if they could call their house at suppertime. And then they giggle and chortle at their original cleverness.
No. This is different.
The phone rings. I look at the number. I don't recognize it, but we get overseas calls from family so I answer anyway.
Here is the conversation:
Hallo!
*silence*
Hello? (Patiently - because sometimes overseas calls take a bit to connect)
*silence*
Hallooooooooo....? (Getting slightly perterbed)
*computer recording, cheerfully* Hello! This is a VERY important call. Please hold while we connect you to one of our representitives. *cue Celine Dion music*
Ok. Did you catch that?
They called ME, and then put ME on hold! They didn't even say who they were!
Then I got thinking...what kind of people think this tactic will work? Who thought up this genius idea? I almost want to wait the awful music out to see what the company is. But on the other hand I don't want to validate them by waiting. I just do. not. understand. how anyone could ever think that this was a good idea! .
I imagine this - they are a bunch of brush-cut professionals in suits and ties, sitting around a mahogany committee table. Oooh, the mahogany makes me think that they are all smoking pipes and talking in a British accent. Maybe they even have their hands over the side of their overstuffed chaires, petting a loyal foxhound. And scratch the ties - they are wearing tweed suits with bowties! Brilliant! I bet the company wants to know our opinion on fox hunting in the 21st century. Maybe when I get these calls, I can just say "Tally Ho!" and they'll leave me alone?
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